Nature Anxiety

This is a thinking note I left for myself. I thought it might be interesting, because we are all humans 
( ?? :) ), and we might just share this feeling too.

I am scared of nature. I've always been like this.
Everytime I wake up early to go for a hike, I feel vulnerable and so free. To compensate, I have a stress response.

It's not a fear of anything in particular. It's not like a fear of spiders, the dark or heights.

It's a deep reminder of mortality, of impending doom, of a return to nature. A loss of structure. I wonder if that is natural.

Why? I want to disseminate this fear.

What is the root of the fear?

Is it hereditary? Or is it an insecurity?
A natural effect of doing something outside one's comfort zone?
Bad experiences?
Desperation? Expression of love for the wild?
Or because I am a city person?

Terror Management

I wonder if this is being used to market outdoor products...because there is such a theory called terror management.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terror_management_theory

In short, people know they are mortal, and knowing that their time is limited, we loosen up and are more likely to buy that gadget you've always wanted.

Maybe that's what my fear is. The innate fear of mortality, and the subsequent life I pursue.

Relation to outdoor experiences & Therapy

All outdoor activities leads to me being more aware of these anxieties and being able to recognize and cope with them. Like sports climbing. The first wall I ever climbed, I took a full 2 hours. I reached the top at closing time. But after that, I managed to do it in 1, then 20 minutes. Of course, a skilled climber should do it within 3 minutes. But point is, I felt less scared every time. That's what matters.

Experiencing the outdoors removes the fears of ignorance. Therapy reduces and helps me understand fears of past experiences.

End

I still have it. As much as fear is considered a negative emotion, I think it's extremely interesting and deep. The more I hike, swim, photograph, interact with nature, the more it becomes a sense of reverence. It is as if we have fallen out of nature, and feel the need to get back in.

v1.0 Published March 26 2015.